{"product_id":"hodg-survivalkit","title":"Ragnarok Survival Kit","description":"\u003cp\u003eWhen the world unfortunately failed to end in 2012, as John Hodgman had predicted in his Netflix Special\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003ca href=\"http:\/\/www.johnhodgman.com\/RAGNAROK\" target=\"_blank\"\u003eRAGNAROK\u003c\/a\u003e, he was not only heaped with shame but also SURPLUS RAGNAROK SURVIVAL KITS. \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eHe created these kits because it seemed that the safest way to pack and mail a RAGNAROK extended DVD would be to surround it with mayonnaise. This is LOGIC. \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eBut then he realized he also wanted to include an engraved urine flask, a sample of his mustache DNA, his downloaded consciousness on a thumb drive, and a beautiful, non-ironic unisex fragrance that may be called “Sperm-Whale,” or “Whale” or “Sperm,” depending on how you read the rebus. \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt was all designed by\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003ca href=\"http:\/\/jessicahische.is\/\" target=\"_blank\"\u003eJESSICA HISCHE\u003c\/a\u003e, who is a genius.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe mayonnaise was made by our friends at\u003cspan\u003e the late \u003c\/span\u003e\u003ca href=\"http:\/\/gothamist.com\/2016\/06\/16\/rip_hipster_mayo.php\" target=\"_blank\"\u003eEMPIRE MAYONNAISE\u003c\/a\u003e in Brooklyn. \u003cstrong\u003e\u003cem\u003eMayonnaise is for entertainment purposes only.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe fragrance was designed to my totally non-joke specifications by\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003ca href=\"http:\/\/www.drom.com\/\" target=\"_blank\"\u003eDROM\u003c\/a\u003e.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe urine flask is empty, but urine is easily made at home.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eAnd remember the DVD? It really exists, in hard copy, Omega-Pulse-Proof form, and it features not only ALL of RAGNAROK, but additional comedy by John Hodgman, additional songs by Cynthia Hopkins, and appearances by Ira Glass and Andrew Sullivan and Tom Scharpling that sadly were cut from the Netflix edit for time. \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan\u003eAnd it all fits within a custom, hard-sided GO BAG, signed by John Hodgman, and sealed and delivered by us. \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"John Hodgman","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":39582633679,"sku":"HODG-RAGNAROK","price":50.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/1829\/4817\/products\/hodg-survivalkit900.jpg?v=1571448947","url":"https:\/\/ellacohen.com\/products\/hodg-survivalkit","provider":"Ellacohen","version":"1.0","type":"link"}